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  • Writer's pictureJodi-Tatiana Charles

New Year Resolutions Are a Set Up for Failure, So Let's Try This Instead...

December 30, 2023

As the calendar flips to January, the air is filled with optimism, and we can't help but make those well-intentioned New Year's resolutions. You know the ones – promising to hit the gym, call your parents more often, and finally tackle that towering pile of unread books. But let's be honest, how many of those resolutions actually survive past the first few weeks of January? Not many, and that's because New Year resolutions are often a set-up for failure. So, let's spice things up this year and try something different.


Instead of setting yourself up for disappointment, consider embracing a more realistic and enjoyable approach to self-improvement. Here's why traditional New Year resolutions might be doing more harm than good and what you can do to make your goals stick.


First of all, resolutions often focus on drastic and sudden changes. Going from zero to hero overnight is a tough task, and when we don't see instant results, it's easy to get discouraged. Instead, try setting smaller, more achievable goals that build up over time. For instance, if you want to get in shape, start with a commitment to exercise a few times a week and gradually increase the intensity and frequency as you go. This way, you won't be overwhelmed by the monumental task of becoming a fitness guru by February.


Another issue with traditional resolutions is that they can be too vague. Saying, "I want to advance in my career" or "I want to spend more time with my loved ones" doesn't provide a clear roadmap for success. Try specifying your goals. For example, "I will take on one additional responsibility at work each quarter" or "I will have a weekly family dinner night to spend quality time with loved ones." These specific goals make it easier to track your progress and stay motivated.


One of the major culprits behind the failure of New Year resolutions is the "all or nothing" mentality. We tend to think that if we slip up once, we might as well throw in the towel. This black-and-white thinking can be discouraging and lead to giving up entirely. Instead, practice self-compassion. Understand that setbacks are a natural part of any journey towards self-improvement. If you super-size a meal when you vowed to cut out fast food, don't beat yourself up. Acknowledge the slip, and then get back on track. Remember, it's a marathon, not a sprint.


Another problem with traditional resolutions is that they often lack accountability. Telling yourself you're going to achieve something is one thing, but sharing your goals with someone else can provide the motivation and support you need. Try finding a mentor, a buddy with similar aspirations, or joining a group with shared interests. You'll be amazed at how much more motivated you become when you have someone cheering you on.


Perhaps the most significant issue with New Year resolutions is that they're typically centered around "fixing" something about yourself. They tend to focus on perceived flaws or shortcomings, which can create a negative and self-critical mindset. Instead, why not shift your perspective? Frame your goals in a positive light, emphasizing self-care, growth, and enjoyment. Instead of saying, I can't travel because I'm too scared of the unknown," try saying, "I want to embrace the adventure of traveling because I deserve to experience new horizons and enrich my life.

So, as we step into the New Year, let's leave behind the pressure and unrealistic expectations of traditional resolutions. Instead, let's opt for a more flexible, forgiving, and enjoyable approach to self-improvement. Embrace the small changes, specific goals, self-compassion, accountability, and positivity, and watch as your New Year becomes a year of genuine growth and fulfillment.


Who knows, by next December, you might just find yourself celebrating your accomplishments, rather than lamenting another year of unmet resolutions.


Cheers to you and a fantastic year of personal progress and happiness!



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